While many of us find quotations like the one above cliche or old-fashioned, the reason why they have stuck in our vernacular is because they hold some sort of truth. I have found this particular quote to hold a great deal of meaning to me at this point in my life.
Strangely enough, the quote came into my head after my own journey to Cleveland, Ohio with the No Doubt concert at the Blossom Music Center as my destination. I have to admit that all of my journeys are spurred by the need to arrive at a destination whether it is a concert or a vacation spot. Even though I believed I was taking this trip in order to rock out to the sounds of one of my favorite bands from the 90s, this was not the case. Someone else had different plans for me; I was going to learn something new about myself in the process. I will spare everyone the details of my personal life, but in order to understand my point of view, it is important to know that I have just come out of a four-year relationship and that my co-pilot for this trip was my former girlfriend.
Before we even left out on our trip, tensions were high. The anxiety was mostly on my end and what I learned about myself on this nine-hour round-trip voyage was that I have the ability to be a very vindictive and mean person. While I knew I had these traits when I was younger, I thought I had left it in my past.
As I drove us home through the night, with a slight detour to take a nap at a rest stop, I learned that if I was pushed hard enough I could become the complete polar opposite of the person I am on a day-to-day basis. While I was surprised that I had the ability to be that person again, the overwhelming feeling I had after the trip was guilt. I couldn't believe that I could say such hurtful things to someone I love, whether we were a couple anymore or not.
After I had time to think, the quote "it's the journey that matters, not the destination" did not only hold a literal meaning to me; it is a good way to look at relationships in general. No matter what destination the relationship has - whether it is marriage, divorce, a mutual break-up or living happily ever after - it is the memories you make in the meantime that matter. I wish I had realized that before I made myself out to be the biggest jerk in the universe to the person I care the most about in the aforementioned universe.
While things may not have worked out in my favor, I have to look back on the past four years and realize that they were the best years in my life so far. People's feelings change and life is hard, but it is best to remember that the speed bumps on your journey are the ones that shape you as a person.
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